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Other Props |
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AtomicBombDesigns
For our logo.
If you need logo's or site design, this is the place to get
it!
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Redbrain:
A question, wrapped in a riddle, wrapped in bacon, submerged in a
jar of ether, placed on a shelf, in a cabin, in the woods.
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| Viciously expelled from the womb some years ago, Elmo
has studied various arts of regression in an attempt
to re-enter that happy land. His quest for a 50-foot
woman frustrated, he now lives in a sensory
deprivation tank, hoping to re-experience that
original moment of coital fruition (the little bang)
and snap out of this troublesome existence. During
the enthusiasm of the Reagan Revolution, Elmo
attempted to found a school of dadaist psychoanalysis
which came to precisely nothing. With this success
under his belt (and little else, it is rumoured), he
began a series of thought experiments designed to
bring about spontaneous evolution into a creature of
light. The conclusions are to be published in
installments on this website. An unsuccessful
campaign in 1992 to be elected Emperor of North
America resulted in his immense popularity amongst
speakers of Esperanto. Or so he imagines. Though a
misanthrope, or "hater of people", he assures us that
it is himself he hates the most, and his vitriolic
address to the public is therefore a pathetic
facsilimie of love. He is a good boy, his mother is
proud, and he is available for romantic dinners,
moonlit strolls on the beach and hard-core ass-fucking.
u |
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Well
if it wasn’t for that minor military stint
in hostile and dangerous areas, I would have
a clean record. But hostile areas are where
they send assholes like me that don’t look
cookie cutter. If I never went I probably
wouldn’t be as fucked up in the head as I
am but I had seen some ridiculous stuff over
there. Guys fucking things that I don’t know
if were alive or dead. I mean these were fucking
kids, we were all kids, we didn’t know how
to act. Man I thought I had really seen it
all until I spent 16 months in a POW camp,
and became like the entertainment. See how
much sucking with I could take, that was my
captors MO, and I took it all. I fought back
but with some serious mind shit, fucked up
there sense of what humans can do when tested.
So I walked, now I stand up straight, and
think life is the cat’s ass, I just hadn’t
seen my fucked up clown face in a while. So
the mirror told me everything I needed to
hear. How long it had been since I tasted
the salty air of a sea port. I made my way
west where I ran into probably the most fucked
up idea known to man, my good pal, Johnny
Happy. Now see John ain’t all there, he’s
got some serious crossed wire shit goin on
under the hood. His name should be Retardo
Montelblan, but it’s Johnny Happy.
Now Fuck All'Yall
Lumpy
The Clown |
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Randy spills his beans.
An embarrassment, a red-death masque of shame, he
is a sentimental phoenix-fledgeling who gets busted for absent-mindedly
singing Elton John tunes at the urinal -- and by men who flush thrice in a
single
crap. He looses the booze gryphon on his liver daily to appear amusing --
even
charming -- instead of pathetic. Some fall for it, but his entrails never
regenerate. Home-educated by his mother in self-help maxims, then
cross-trained in the catechism and riverside baptist revivals, he was
relentlessly threshed in adolescence by hooligans who ligated him for his
name and his sense of grace, confusing him sexually and
ethically. Excommunicated from the Anglican church at twenty, he is hard
and a dangerous person to know; he inspires exhaustion, self-esteem, nausea,
and the nurturing instinct. Nothing is scarier than a wounded baby who
appears a normal -- even kindly -- young man.
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History and present whereabouts unknown. |
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| Unkle Slappy Nuttz is the makings of what history fears. The name alone
gives off a rather retarded view of this man/myth/little debbi snack cake
eating legend.
if one tries to sit back and think about all evil forces from the creation
of man to global warming they all come back to Unkle Slappy Nuttz.
Altho Unkle could snap your neck like a twig through his computer he doesnt
want to. instead he will tell you dumb ass stories about time travel and
beastality and maybe interlink them like fine china in the idaho sun. Has
he every done what he will/has spoke about?
Who knows, in all honesty hes a son of a bitch and i pray he dies from
herpes. |
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